ETC food grades

Usually, the ETC ( English Tourist Council) Quality Assurance guys fill me with boredom. The few I had met in the past spoke of
"adding more cushions, adding pebbles in the fireplace, making our menus more flowery" all of which are anathema to Mark and I ( I believe to our children as well). But last month I met a pair of decent gentlemen.

One of them was a global traveller and I thought quite liberal. One of the Inspectors had sought to invite this fellow inspector who had lived in Singapore and travelled to other South Asian Countries, to assess the food. Of course, I was told this after the inspection. Usually when food critics make comments on South Indian food they are either ill equipped to do so or are just ignorant and just assume that a blanket perspective is perfectly adequate.

This man- he understood the food. That was it. I didnt have to explain. What a great relief. The ETC had got it right this time. I even had a debate about style and about how every place was unique. It was grand.

And what did they have to say. " The food was outstanding - 100% "Exceptional Quality".This accolade I have been told, has been awarded to only five other establishments on the island. Grand. I felt like a puffed up Red Robin.

However, sadly, the assessor was not favourable to our style- our candles and straight talk, our lack of flowery language and effusive mannersims did not bode well for us. The assessor also failed to verify a host of things such as " Environmental Awareness" despite being awarded a Gold Award by the Green Island Scheme. So, instead of acheiving the highest overall grade we lost out on the lack of frills.

But, we are one of the few on the island to receive 100% on the category of "food". That is what I shall celebrate.

what a scam

I have just unearthed a strange flimflam that seems to be practised in small hotels, B&B's on the island. I am not sure it is universal around UK, but out here it seems rampant.Quite similar to the sign that often says " No Vacancy". But here is the thing.

If you are closed for the season or for a particular period of time, the general public notice is "Fully Booked". HUH? But we know that the owners and staff are away on a holiday - so how can they be fully booked ? Foxy!! I am not sure that all accomodation providers do this sort of thing. But I have found some wily ones who give the public an impression that they are fully booked, rather than " we are sunning ourselves in Hawaii or shopping in Paris, suckers"!

The inside story. I have also seen many accomodation providers in the local cash and carry loading on the most hideous OJ (unbranded) or some other vile looking products but who also advertise serving fresh juice in their marketing bumpf. A Ha !! And then load on cheap bacon from Booker (you may wonder what we buy from Booker. Mostly toilet rolls, washing up stuff, napkins, candles). All these little secrets.

Which reminds me of the experience of one of our previous guests at another hotel. The owner had a swish Porsche convertible but hey, guests had to use "Single Ply" toilet rolls !

This accomodation business is cut throat and vicious- at least on the island ( or perhaps even on this side of the island) and those that do survive have to either develop a rhino skin or sink fast. Where do I sit in all this ? Jury's out on that one.